Your Diocese

GILMAN, IL — Alyssa Gilbert is no recent immigrant to the United States, but her zeal and willingness to endure drudgery, destitution and hard work is characteristic of a newcomer’s zeal when it comes to envisioning dignity for herself and a better life for her two children.

At the age of 31, Gilbert, who separated from her husband last April and left a life she’d come to know in Austin, Texas, today fosters a well-developed frontier spirit that winks at pain and barely winces at the idea of sleep deprivation. Having agreed to an interview about the circumstances in life that earned her family a spot on the annual Gift of Christmas list, a campaign coordinated by Your Diocese in conjunction with Catholic Charities in the Diocese of Joliet for the purpose of eliciting donations to assist needy families at Christmas, Gilbert and 15-month-old son Austin sit in the corner of a fast-food eatery that she can’t afford to patronize. It’s only McDonalds, a familiar, inexpensive restaurant that dots a sea of rest stops off Interstate 57, but Gilbert watches every penny in a relentless effort to make ends meet. On $383 a month from the federally funded program, Temporary Assistance for Needy Families, it’s tough, said Gilbert with a stoic, stiff-jawed response.

A participant of Catholic Charities Transitional Housing Program, which is designed to make it possible for low-income families to escape a downward economic spiral, Gilbert requests nothing for herself. Having reconciled with the need to ask for assistance if she is to survive with her family intact, Gilbert said she would appreciate gift cards, so she can purchase a few of the toys that she knows her oldest son, 10-year-old Levi, has his eye on. Meanwhile, Austin, a cheery looking blonde who loves butter cookies, has special needs. He was diagnosed with a congenital disease called DiGeorge syndrome, which is blamed for the cleft palate at birth and heart defects. Austin is small for his age and lags a bit behind developmentally, according to his mom; he requires the kind of educational toys identified to help with learning.

Having grown up in rural Iroquois County, about 20 miles south of Kankakee, the perky blue-eyed blonde said when she determined finally it was time to “give her husband a wake up call,” she left with the kids a few months before Hurricane Katrina spread its swath of destruction over the coastal cities along the Gulf of Mexico, and drove home. She has family here—her father and brother share a mobile home, her cousin lives in Gilman and cuts the boys’ hair and her grandmother, who just passed away, spent her life in and around the communities of Gilman and Watseka, which is 14 miles east on Illinois Route 24. Gilbert and the boys live on the second floor of a two-story farmhouse in Watseka that has been converted into three rental units.

“It has 13 windows. I love the windows,” she said. It’s about 900 square feet with two bedrooms, a bathroom, living room and a small kitchen. “I’m still waiting for the landlord to paint it.”

The last eight months can be described as a whirlwind for the Gilberts. “I was getting counseling from Harbor House…for domestic violence (victims), and I needed housing. We were living with my father, but we needed our own space,” she said. Her counselor utilized the network for social services and got her connected with Catholic Charities. In a few weeks time, the Gilberts were living in a home of their own.

For a few months, Gilbert worked full time selling advertising for the Times Republic, but she knew that without a college degree, she’d never earn enough to provide the kind of home she wants for her children. “I wanted to be self-sufficient,” she declared. With a guarantee of support from an array of counselors, she quit her job and enrolled full-time in Parkland College in Champaign, Ill. “I love graphics. I’ll get an associate’s (degree) in applied science. I want to work at a newspaper or magazine, doing graphics,” she said.

The graphic design program she seeks is offered during the day at Parkland, making the program more attractive than the night only program at the much closer Kankakee Community College. “I had to be home with my kids at night,” she said. In her first semester, Gilbert earned 12 credit hours; she anticipates an “A” average.

Certainly, going to college and getting the baby to numerous appointments from pediatricians to cardiac specialists and geneticists constitutes a host of complications, the least of which is the 70-mile twice-daily trip to Champaign. “I told my teachers upfront that I had a special needs child and I’d miss some classes. They weren’t all that supportive at first. I had to prove to them that I wasn’t just missing classes for nothing and that I was serious about school,” she said.

Meanwhile, Catholic Charities demonstrated their unconditional support and friendship for Gilbert, linking her up with a host of resources. Gilbert meets the low-income qualifications of several state and federal assistance programs, her tuition is paid, counseling and medical expenses are met, the family qualifies for food stamps and she gets reimbursed for gas to and from the college. Still the budget is tight. The car needs routine upkeep. The cost of an oil change is a significant slice out of the family budget.

However, Gilbert shines not only for her determination and stamina under pressure. Her organizational and financial management skills come in handy for a woman who is meticulous when it comes to accounting for every penny. She takes every advantage of coupons and looks forward to “rewards” offered by Catholic Charities as a motivational gift for adhering to the goals she has outlined. A free box of laundry detergent or a bag of diapers elicits a smile from a mother on a strict budget.

With 19 months left in the transitional housing program, Gilbert plans to make the best use of her time. “I’ll probably go to school in the summer,” she said, ensuring a timely completion of the degree. She has three semesters left.

During the last few weeks of December and the first couple in January, the typical college student looks forward to a relatively carefree month away from the books, but Gilbert sees the time off between semesters as a godsend. “I’m looking forward to having time with my kids at night. That’s my present.”

Overall, she said, “I feel like I always have a positive outlook on life. When I face challenges I have to pull up my bootstraps. I have a strong faith in God and I rely on him.”