Your Diocese

JOLIET, IL — In the 1950s, the word “family” conjured up a picture-perfect lifestyle, mom cooking dinner, dad smoking a pipe and reading the paper, while brother and sister did their homework nearby.

In today’s society, however, that picture no longer defines the ideal family. In fact, there is no longer a set picture of what a perfect family should be. Carla Williams and her family of eight adopted children are an excellent example of the changing face of the American family.

Williams, a foster parent support specialist with Catholic Charities in Joliet, and her husband Dave became interested in adoption a little over 10 years ago. “We were also interested in becoming foster parents as well,” she said.

Like many parents, Williams and her husband wanted an infant they could cuddle and pamper, however, as time passed they began to see the appeal of welcoming an older child into their home. “I have nephews who were nine and 10 at the time, and I began to wonder what it would be like for them if they didn’t have anyone to call mommy and daddy,” she said.

To that end, the Williamses expressed a willingness to the staff at Catholic Charities to adopt a child of any age or ethnicity. “We felt we could help these children by giving them a loving home,” she said. After waiting for a little over a year, the Williams family welcomed 2-day-old Harrison into their household.

While many new parents would have their hands full taking care of one newborn, the Williamses added another member to their family, a mere four days after adopting Harrison. Taking one look at 13-year-old Gabrielle, Williams said she and her husband knew the young girl would be a perfect fit. “She needed a home and here we were.

“We had friends who thought we were nuts,” admitted Williams, but she added that Gabrielle jumped right into her new family life without a whimper. “She loved taking care of the baby and would offer to help me out every chance she got.”

A year after welcoming Gabrielle and Harrison into the family, Williams said she and her husband felt called to open their hearts to another pair of children in need. “That’s when we took Adam and Jaxson into our home,” she said.

A pair of African-American siblings, Adam and Jaxson were ages 3 and 4 when they came to the Williams household. “It’s been wonderful watching them grow up, especially Adam, because he was so withdrawn when he came to us,” she said.

Even though she now had four young children scampering around her home, Williams said she still felt like there was much more she and her husband could do. To that end, they welcomed another pair of siblings, Robert and May, into their lives a year after Adam and Jaxson.

The final members of the family were added a few years ago, when Catholic Charities found themselves in the middle of an emergency. “They had no place to put these siblings, so they asked if we would take them for the weekend,” she said.

The Hispanic siblings, Josh and Christina, made such an impression on the Williams family that they decided to give them a permanent home. “In fact, our other children told us that if we didn’t take them in, they would never talk to us again,” she said.

With eight children, several of whom are teen-agers, balancing everyday activities can be difficult, but Williams said she worked out a system that makes sure everyone does their tasks with a minimum of fuss. “We have charts for chores, charts for bathroom time, even charts for bedtimes,” she said.

Because the Williamses are a biracial family, they often are on the receiving end of curious glances and stares. However, Williams, who is Caucasian, said both she and her husband have discussed the issue with their children, to the point they no longer notice other people’s interest. “We tell them that people may look different on the outside, but on the inside they are very much they same,” she said.

Recently Williams was honored with the Adoption Excellence Award presented by the Administration for Children and Families, which is part of the U.S. Department of Heath and Human Services for her work in foster care and adoption. “I never dreamed I would be honored for something I do every day,” said Williams.

Having been nominated for the honor by a co-worker, Williams said she was shocked when she found out about her win. “I kept asking her if she had really meant to nominate me, because I thought she was pulling my leg,” she said.

Living in a house with eight children isn’t always sunshine and roses, admitted Williams. “When I come to work, it’s my way of getting away from the chaos for a while,” she said with a smile.

However, Williams said she wouldn’t change her lifestyle for anything in the world. “I enjoy being surrounded by family,” she said.